CANCER ISN'T EASY!!!! - saturday 29th February 2020

When you have cancer alot of your days are hard!

There are days where you feel like you can do everything and there are days where you feel and can't do anything.

Today is Saturday 29th February 2020, and today I'm having one of those not able to do anything days.
Every saturday we go to my nan's to see her and my aunties and uncles and little cousins.

More times than not on previous weekends I've been able to mess around with my little cousin and more importantly do alot for myself.

Today I am having an extremly bad day. This morning I woke up at 0830am and I had to have help getting dressed from my mum. I descided today as I feel awful I'm going to wear clean Pjs and fluffy socks on my feet and then I will be as comfortable as I can be.



Because my body is really swollen due to fluid retention and it's also really uncomfortable I've had to borrow and wear my dads spare pair of shoes due to the fact I cannot fit my feet in my own shoes as my feet have swallon up that big
(Photo doesn't do it justice)

Due to my mobility being poor anyway but its extra poor today because of the fact of all this fluid retention I'm carrying more weight so I'm struggling to move more as everywhere is heavy and tight and stiff so I've had to have help with getting me to and from the toilet, people bringing me bits and pieces I wanted or needed.

People don't realise how hard suffering with cancer truly is, I'll be honest with you I hate being this way. I hate having to rely on people so I can do normal day things.

People see me mostly smiling whenever they see me in pictures or whatever but behind them smiles is large watery tears that come from deep within the body.



"WELL THAT'S CANCER FOR YOU!!!".


Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Stem cell transplant 1: week 4: recovery part 2:

Day 22: monday 20th august 18: Last night I slept like a log, I didn't sleep with any pyjama bottoms on last night because my bottom and front needed to air (due to the fact my skin was extremely sore and some areas were broken skin). I had a foot massarge and my finger nails painted. The male nurse told me that today my neutrophils are 0.87 so that means I'm not neutrapenic anymore! 😀, the doctors are saying that possibly next week I will be allowed to be discharged home. Today i ate 1 peach muller corner yoghurt. Today also I had a physiotherapy appointment where the physiotherapist came to me on the ward and gave me some exercises to do each day and increase each day. Day 23: tuesday 21st august 18:  Mum and my brother visited today. I also saw my clic Sargent worker who is sending my wish thing off today. I drank a fortisip drink (special build-up drink) and ate 6 chilies cheese bite things from burger king (freshly made). I sat in my red armchair and did my exercises. The
Read more

My first bone marrow biopsy:

Image
12th april 2018: I was moved to mulbarton ward in the early hours of the morning, I was put in my own room which looked on onto a little garden area, I was still extremely upset about it all. Later on dr Charlotte came and told me today I would be having a bone marrow biopsy, I was very nervous of this and worried about moving when they did the biopsy etc. **for anyone who doesnt know what a bone marrow biopsy is it's when you have a very long needle go into the back of one of your hip bones and then they extract red marrow which is the soft centre of your hip bones and they then send it off for analysis to check if your bone marrow is making any healthy blood cells and also see what my leukemia is doing. They also take bone during this biopsy process too if they need it.** Dr Charlotte prescribed me a lorazapam to help calm me and relax me through the biopsy. The nurse gave me the lorazapam and in about half hour they returned for the biopsy. Dr Charlotte was doing the procedure
Read more

Fighting so hard poem!

My body if tired, I have fought so long, how to prepare what you are unsure,of the future steps I now have to take, I will be strong, happy and give it all it takes, life unfortunately hasn't been for me, but I do have amazing friends and family, so to rap up this poem I will say, I love you all each and every day 🧡
Read more